05/16/2007

Editorial

In Benzie, employee perks go beyond the doughnuts

Workaday life is tough, what with rampant layoffs, downsizing and corporate demands that we all do more with less.

A lot of folks in Michigan are out of work, and those fortunate enough to have jobs are powerless to stop the erosion of workplace perks that make our lives a bit more bearable.

That's why it's so heartening to hear of one employer willing to go the extra mile for workers, an employer that understands a little pampering can go a long way to reducing workers' stress.

That benevolent employer is Benzie County government, home to the Benzie County Playhouse, perhaps the all-time greatest break room in employment history.

To Benzie's maintenance crew, perks didn't mean a pop machine, cinnamon rolls or even a company picnic. No, the government campus in Beulah offered some employees far better benefits.

In a big shed just a stone's throw from Benzie County administrative offices, just a short stroll from the county prosecutor's office, just a few steps from the sheriff's department, Benzie maintenance men had a place where they could kick back after a tough morning of cutting grass, refilling toilet paper dispensers or changing a lightbulb or two.

Their playhouse was chock full of adult playthings: porn magazines, marijuana, cocaine, dozens of marijuana pipes — enough to sate the Woodstock nation — and remarkably, inexplicably, a full-size tanning bed.

Porn, dope and a tan: For some, that's not a bad day at the office.

We realize the playhouse's accoutrements might prompt scorn from some labor traditionalists, but hey, it's not easy being a county maintenance professional. High stress jobs call for, well, a high level of relaxation.

It's unclear where janitor Alan Ernest Blattner, 56, and his supervisor, Donald Zaleski, 55, dug up the tanning bed, but Blattner 'fessed up to supplying the porn mags, while Zaleski, prior to his death in a December alcohol-related car crash, told authorities he was responsible for the cocaine paraphernalia.

The marijuana pipes? Many of them came straight from the sheriff's department's evidence room. Originally seized in drug busts, the pipes, in all shapes and sizes, were headed for the garbage can until the enterprising janitors spotted them and realized they had just the place for them.

It's hard to believe Zaleski and Blattner kept the playhouse to themselves. There are rumors aplenty that other county folk stopped by for a tan or some other form of relaxation, and more power to them, if that's the case.

That's because government work is no piece of cake in Benzie County, and sometimes employers need to offer that little something extra in order to attract and keep the brightest and the best workers.