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February 24, 2002Peggy Miller blazed a path of grace, courageBy LORAINE ANDERSONRecord-Eagle regional editor I didn't know Peggy Miller well, but she's been a beacon for me over the last five years and will continue to be for the rest of my years. She was one of my heroes - for her courage, her unflagging positive attitude in the face of stark odds, her determination, humor, her devotion to and love for her family - husband David, son Alex, daughters Katie and Amy. Peggy died on Tuesday after a valiant fight with breast cancer that started with a mastectomy in 1995 followed by a stem-cell transplant in 1996. Ours was the kind of acquaintance that comes through work. I have worked with her husband, Dave, for almost 16 years. Most of that time, Dave and I have sat less than five feet apart. His is the voice on the other side of my cubicle wall. I know Peggy through the stories - funny, warm, endearing and admiring - I have heard from him over the years about their children, their earlier years in Ypsilanti before they moved to Traverse City in 1986 and these recent years as Peggy refused to let cancer cow her. Peggy and I saw each other only occasionally during those years - at the annual company party, when she came to the office to drop something off for Dave, at Home Depot where she worked, during the reading of the names of survivors and of people to be remembered at the annual American Cancer Society Relay for Life. I kept track of Peggy because I marveled at her indomitable spirit that made her a feisty and ferocious opponent to cancer. She took great risks. A stem-cell transplant is a harrowing experience. Through it all she continued to laugh, to love, to connect and be there for all close to her, to embrace each day as it came, living always as if there was a tomorrow. And there was until Tuesday. Her approach to life after cancer, her optimism and courage set an example for me and many others. For the last four years since my brush with breast cancer, I've had her on a list I keep in my heart of people who have helped make a difference in my life by the example they set. The day after she died I asked several friends in Traverse City and elsewhere what they would remember about Peggy. The same words and phrases kept popping up. Laughter, lots of it. A good outlook on life. A great sense of humor. A very special woman with a very special courage who took risks. Sweet. Matter-of-fact, a woman of common sense who could speak to you frankly with a beautiful sense of ease, not that "in-your-face" variety. Devoted to her children. When I was younger, I used to think that bravery was flashy, the kind of stuff that makes for war movies. It's more subtle than that. It's not the absence of fear but how you move through life in the face of great odds. Peggy moved with grace and determination, living fully in the present, embracing the moment and never giving up the idea of a future. That is Peggy's tremendous legacy to all of us. Her indomitable spirit lives on in family and friends, giving strength in sorrow and a sense of great fortune for having known her. A beacon always. |
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