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March 29, 1998Starkey overcame biggest lossBy NICK EDSONRecord-Eagle Sports Editor Dennis Starkey was only 11 when it happened. He was watching a district basketball game at Mancelona High School when the school superintendant tapped him on the shoulder. "Come with me," said the school official with a grim look on his face. Dennis was led to his mother Phyllis. "She broke the news to me," said the 39-year-old Starkey. "She told me my dad had died of a heart attack." That was 27 years ago. Today, Starkey has taken his team to the Class B semifinals for the second year in a row and been named the coach of the first Record-Eagle All-Region Basketball Team. Dennis Starkey's dad was the elementary principal at Mancelona, a man respected in the community and revered by the children he oversaw. He was a man strong on discipline, but quick with a smile. "At first I didn't want to believe what my mother told me," said Starkey about his initial reaction to the news of his father's death. "I not only saw him at home every day, but at school. People still tell me that he was a person they liked to be around, that he was committed to working with kids." Just like his third oldest son. There were six children left to be raised by Phyllis Starkey. David, the oldest, was in college when his dad died. The rest lived at home in Mancelona - Diane, Dan, Dennis, Debbie and Doug. Sometimes you wonder how people pull through in such a situation. Phyllis Starkey didn't just "get by" raising a family, she did a beautiful job. All six went on to graduate from college and get good jobs. All six are as humble as the day is long. "My mom deserves so much credit," said Dennis. "I have so much respect and admiration for her. "She's one of those people who not only was a great role model as a person, she was active in the community. She still is." And she rarely misses a Petoskey game, even though she still lives in Mancelona. "There were times when my youngest brother Doug was playing a JV game in Inland Lakes and she'd watch that game, then get in the car and come to the game I was coaching at Vanderbilt," he said. "When people ask me if I'm close to my mom, I just have a hard time describing how great my relationship is with her. She's had to go through so much, and yet she's the one who's always there to support you." Dennis Starkey was a high school basketball star at Mancelona, scoring more than 1,000 points. He remembers playing against Glen Lake in the regionals at the Traverse City Central gym. His Petoskey team is a member of the Big North Conference, so it comes to the Central gym once a year. "Every time I walk in the Traverse City gym I think back to high school," he said with a smile. "I remember playing Glen Lake and (coach) Don Miller. I learned a lot about basketball from Don. I think he's had a big influence on a lot of coaches." Following high school, Starkey went to college at Alma, where he played junior varsity basketball. After graduation, he landed head coaching spots at Boyne City (one year) and Vanderbilt (three years) before taking over at Petoskey in 1986. In 16 years of coaching, he has 250 career wins. He runs a tight ship, stressing fundamentals and making sure his players behave on and off the court. Yet, away from the game he is soft-spoken and polite, like the rest of his family. The past two years have been the highlight of his career, leading the Northmen to the Class B semifinals. "This group of kids has had to deal with a lot of pressure because of high expectations," said Starkey, whose family includes his wife Karen and young sons Kevin (a first grader) and Cory (5). "The best part of the coaching profession to me is simply working with kids. And the thrills are what keep you going." Before the final home game this season - Parent's Night - Starkey uncharacteristically got emotional. "I was telling the team about appreciating your parents, how you never know how long they'll be around," he said. "I told them it was 27 years ago to the day I had lost my dad." His voice cracked as he told them. "But it meant a lot to Dennis to let them know that," said his wife Karen. "He came home and told me about it afterward." Starkey admits he looked for male role models when he was growing up and found them in two of his high school coaches - Jerry Delling and John Neumann. "They were friends of my dad and they stood for a lot of the things he did," he said. "Between my mom, my teachers in school and my coaches, I think I adjusted to not having my dad around. But I did miss him. I still do." At 39, Starkey expects to be coaching many more years. But he's already starting to feel old. "I'm starting to coach against guys whose dads I've coached against," he said, referring to new coaches like Kalkaska's Brett Graham. "It does make you feel a little old." Yet Starkey still enjoys the rigors of the job. "There is pressure to produce," he said. "Some of that comes from within. But one of the best parts about this job is the relationships you develop over the years. You meet some pretty special people in sports." None more special, of course, than the fan who has shown up for all of his games, all of his life. "Mom really loves coming to our games," he said with a proud smile. "It's kind of nice knowing she's there." |
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